The world would be a better place if we could just:

1. Stop being so greedy and concerned only with money.

2. Start taking care of the earth instead of abusing it.

3. Let people be free to practice whatever religion they believe in without judging, trying to force them to believe what you believe, and without descrimination.

4. Make healthcare a basic human right.

I wonder if I will ever see any of these in my lifetime???????

If I could go back and relive one day in my life it would be the day when X told me that he loved me. I did not believe him. I told him he was a lier. If I knew then what I know now, I would have accepted his love as real. Back then I looked at the world through trauma colored glasses. I hated myself and felt completely undeserving of love. I did not trust people, especially men, so I refused to believe him. I was behaving in the world as if I was still living in an abusive environment. The problem with living that way is that you make decisions based on oversensitive flight or fight reactions. So, when you make a decision or respond to someone with this distorted view, everything is upsidedown and decisions are not based on the reality that you are safe and that you are deserving of love.

I hate doctors, or at least most of them. They are usually arrogant, greedy, know-it-all little prigs with no compassion. Hmmm….. I gues I really feel strongly about that. Hehehe. Well, After getting missdiagnossed for about 8 years from many different doctors, I think I should be a little skeptical and doubtful about their abilitities. Most American doctors only care about how much money they can line their pockets with. It’s a flaw in how we train doctors in the US. It has now become a profession chosen because one can “make a ton of money” and not because they actually have compassion or care about people. I know that some of you are thinking how else is research and development of medicine going to improve if it’s not paid for. Well if I had the answer to that believe you me I would be shouting it from the rooftops! I just have a problem with doctors, insurance companies, pharmacuetical companies and hospitals making so much money on people sick and dying. It is interesting to me that while the rest of the economy had been declining and hurting, many of the businesses above have seen their profits rise. No wonder they all have their panties in a wad about possible reform to healthcare. They just don’t want the gravytrain to end! It may be their gravytrain but to the rest of us it is a graveyard train!

Wow, I think I just went off on a rant. I am just not feeling good and I really don’t want to have to see a doctor.

Something that I lost that I want back is my first dog Tiki. I got him right after my father died. He was a wonderful old soul. I was 20 years old and I had a really bad phobia of dogs. I had been attacked by a dog as a child, and so my fear of even the smallest dog was great! I don’t know why I got it in my head to get a dog, but I just did. Tiki was a Lhasa Apso. When my sister and I went to go “just look” at the puppies, I told her not to let me get one. Well, to make a long story short I went home that night with Tiki. My sister and I were living on campus at Texas A&M. They definitely did not allow dogs in the dorms. As a puppy Tiki had a penchant for art, he loved to chew my sister’s very expensive art history books. When we moved off campus he loved looking out of the window of our apartment. He moved with me to Dallas when I graduated from college. He was with me for 12 years, and I miss him very much. He was very intuitive and connected with every human he met. They say Lhasa Apsos are the reincarnations of the Dali Lamas, I definitely believe that about Tiki.

I had a wonderful time in Arizona!  I had been there before, but I didn’t get the opportunity to really explore and see the area.  These are the things that I loved most about Arizona. 

1.  Seeing Jehara and Pastaman!  It was so good to spend time with them, explore, relax and talk.  

2.  The indie coffee shop in Phoenix near their house called Hob Knobs.  They make the most delicious Veggie Mon Sandwich. 

3.  Jehara’s place-they have this eccentric landlady and the place has a lot of character.  

4.  The little courtyard at J’s place with its mishmash of art, a statue of the Virgin  Mary and memorials for their pets that have passed away. 

5.  Another indie coffee shop going the other direction from J’s house called Fair Trade.  They sell a unique assortment of local art. 

6.  The light rail – you really don’t need a car for all your travels.   

7.  Sedona – metaphysical community 

8.  Jerome – an awesome artist community, very inspiring 

9.  Trader Joe’s – we don’t have them in Texas 

10.  Fantasia – a cute little metaphysical shop 

11.  Red Rocks 

12.  Energy Vortexes 

13.  Opportunities for artists 

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Jehara lives in downtown Phoenix in an artsy little neighborhood that is near the art museums and of course a library.  She has a quirky landlady.  The place has a cute courtyard that is decorated in an eclectic way.   The front door faces into the courtyard.  Her landlady has three dogs, a docile old black lab and two Chihuahuas, one of which seems to be a little bit psycho.  We have hardly used a car at all since I have been here.  We have walked or used the light rail to go everywhere.  This has been interesting to me since I come from Dallas, the land of cars only.  The light rail is amazingly easy to use.

The first night we walked to a Mexican restaurant and stopped at a small shop nearby.  Inside the shop they had pieces of art made from various local artists.  One of the things that I found to be most interesting were these art pieces made from the wood that is recovered from the inside of a Suaro Cactus.  apparently, once the cactus dies they are able to harvest its core interior that is smooth and beautiful.  On the second night jehara cooked and we had these truly awesome margaritas and played scrabble, which I lost (only because I was drunk). 

When I was here for Jehara’s wedding I had gone to this little metaphysical shop called Fantasia.  I wanted to go back, so we took the light rail and walked to the shop.  After shopping there, Pastaman picked us up in the car and we went to his parents house for dinner.  I really love his parents, especially his mom.  She cooked a marvelous dinner of veggie Mexican food.  It was a feast of veggies, chips and queso, tacos, soup and margaritas.  We played games and watched a recording of the women’s long ice skating program from the Olympics.

On Friday we saw “Alice in Wonderland” which was pretty good.  It has me wanting to read the books again.  That night we went to “First Friday” which is an open house for art galleries in downtown Phoenix.  They also have a street fair with artists, various vendors and bands playing.  It was a great place to people watch! 

Saturday, The Heard Museum was having a festival featuring Native American art, music and dancing.  One of the musicians playing at the festival was R.Carlos Nakai.  I happen to really love his music and was very excited to have the opportunity to see him playing live!  His music features the Native American flute, and he creates beautiful cross-cultural, modern, world-beat jazz.  He was awesome!  His aura was amazing, even from a distance.  I have not often seen such vibrant colors in an aura, and he had the golden halo which is rare to see.  After I listened to his music I meandered around looking at the different artist booths.  There were some incredible sculptures, paintings, ceramics and jewelry.  The one thing I did not like about the festival was the set-up.  The entrances were very difficult to find and the organization of the booths was a bit chaotic.  I aimlessly wandered from booth to booth.  I could have stayed longer, but I had to meet Jehara back at her house because we were going to see a play that evening.

Saturday night we met some people and went with them to see The Vagina Monologues.  We were in this one chicks condo waiting for someone else to arrive and her dog was acting a little spastic, which is normal for a dog when they get excited about new people in their house.  What happened next shocked me completely to my inner core.  This chick picked up her dog by the front legs and then literally threw him several feet towards the couch.  the dog landed with a thud on his head on the back of the couch and gave a little whimper.  Man, I am telling you she could have killed that dog the way she threw it.  The dog was very frightened after that, and just sat on the couch stunned.  I just don’t understand why people like that have pets.  They are not toys, they are living breathing souls that deserve love and respect.   Once the other girl got there we left for the play.  I have never seen it performed live.  It was very interesting.  I had really high expectations since I had heard about how it was when Jehara did it at UTA.  It was good to see it, but I was a little disappointed the way ASU put it on.  There were no interesting lobby displays, and they herded us like cattle once they opened the doors.  During the performance it was very distracting when they kept letting late people in.  They would open the doors which made loud creaking noises and then light would pour in.  It was very distracting.  The director did her opening introduction reading from a computer, and it was very weird.  They also did a lot of action on the floor in the front of the stage which made it very difficult to see some of the performers and I had to move around and strain to see them.  I liked the play, because of the content, not because of the performance of that evening.  Then at the end when they were making closing announcements they had a wedding proposal.  Quite frankly, it was very uncomfortable and strange.  After the play, we went to this Mexican restaurant that was pretty good.  The prices were good and they had a good menu. 

Sunday, Jehara and I went to Sedona for a psychic fair.  They had free lectures that were very interesting.  We participated in a healing sound circle and we went to the Chakra Balancing lecture which was amazing.  I had some readings which I am still processing and will write more about later.  It has been a whirlwind couple of days, and I am exhausted.  I have been having a great time.

So far, so good!  The comfy-cone is awesome!  Cosmo can eat, drink, play ball, sleep with a little extra padding, and when he runs into walls with the comfy-cone it does not hurt him or the walls!  It has kept him away from his sutures.